“But I will raise up for Myself
a faithful priest who will do
according to what is in
My heart and in My soul;
and I will build him an enduring house,
and he will walk before My anointed always.”
I Samuel 2:35
You know those days when you ask ‘Why? ‘Why am I doing this?’
Those days when the task seems bigger than it did yesterday. The goal seems a bit fuzzy. Energy is waning and you just want to sit down. I had one of those days last week. I was tired — mentally, physically, emotionally tired. This year has been a “Go forward” year. I’ve been moving out of comfort zones and into new territory with writing and music and marketing. I know I’m doing what I’m supposed to do; there has been too much confirmation.
But the question still caught in my throat: ‘Why?’
Warm water ran over my face as I read my Permanent To-do List on the whiteboard in the shower:
- Go forward
I read the words several times, although they’re memorized from sharing my mornings with them for the last two years. They make perfect sense. Words I believe and cling to. Yet my weary mind stepped sideways for a moment. “Why?” I asked. “Why am I doing this?”
And as soft as the water on my neck, He said, “For Me.”
Suddenly the warm water felt like oil. Warm healing balm. Strengthening marrow. Two words. Two simple words, yet they echoed over and over in my thoughts. Even now I hear them:
With two words He brought me back down to the foundation. Two words wiped away all sub-points and secondary reasons. Sure, I love what I do, but I don’t do it because I love it. I do it because I love Him. And I love Him like I never knew I could because He loves me like I never knew I could be loved. No other reason is needed. No other cause or motivation necessary. Not when I hear His voice.
Yes, I will do it for You. I will go forward. I will expect. I will believe. I will not be disappointed. Because You are worth it all.
Just as it is written, ‘Behold, I lay in Zion a stone of stumbling and a rock of offense, and he who believes in Him
will not be disappointed.'” Romans 9:33